December 17, 1994
A CHILD
Alone and hurt. Where is love? Who can hold her? Tell her she is special?
Who can comfort her and tell her it's okay to cry?
Who can listen when she feels afraid and sad?
An emotionally absent and strict father.
A busy, controlling and manipulative mother.
Sisters who are much older.
Brothers who tease and ridicule.
Strangers who violate her body.
She is abandoned, but does not know it.
She is rejected, but does not recognize it.
She is betrayed, but cannot see it.
She learns her lessons well:
Do not be sad, lonely, hurt, vulnerable or needy!
And most of all: Do not be angry!
Numb your emotions! Hide your feelings! Be strong!
Be someone you are not!
So you can be liked, so you can be accepted,
And so maybe you can be loved.
AN ADULT
She has learned well: "You have no rights"
And she searches for the magical person,
Who will give her what she missed in her childhood.
Her needs and wants are not met.
She does not really know what they are,
And consequently she does not know how to ask for them.
And again, there is abandonment, rejection and betrayal.
Does this have to go on?
Does she have to continue to experience
This pain, this loneliness, this helplessness?
This feeling of worthlessness, not deserving of love?
NO!!!
I, the adult, reclaim my childhood!
I will grieve my losses! I will own my pain!
I will show my emotions! And I will feel!
I will be for my child who ever she needs:
A father, a mother, a brother, a sister, a friend, a teacher and a lover.
I will tell her that she is beautiful, strong, worthwhile,
And deserving of love, health, happiness, peace, trust and balance.
My precious child, I will comfort you, I will hold you,
I will wipe your tears and I will teach you how to trust again.
I will respect and validate all your feelings, emotions, needs and wants.
A new awareness.
A new way to healing.
A return to innocence.
Elisabeth Leonore
Copyrighted 1994-2001
